“YOU put your left hand in, your left hand out.

“In, out. In, out. Shake it all about. Do the Maradona and you turn around - that’s what it’s all about.”

No doubt that old terrace favourite of our brothers and sisters north of the border will be brought out of retirement at Hampden Park on November 19.

Not just for a nostalgic and not-so-subtle jibe at us English, but of course, to embrace the placing of Argentina’s national side in the hands of God.

And what a monumental night that will be.

Perceptions of most sporting icons veer one way or the other. Not with Diego Armando Maradona.

There is no ‘OR’ about it. Most who pass judgement on him usually love AND hate him.

Nobody has ever combined genius with idiocy, irresistibility with deceit and displayed human traits of both the visionary and vulgar quite like the new head coach of Los Albicelestes.

As a player, he danced under bright lights of the Nou Camp while fighting with Barcelona’s aristocracy.

He gave Napoli their moment among European football’s elite - and even then scandal still managed to follow him.

He single handedly took the World Cup to his home land.

Even the most patriotic of Englishmen would fantasise about his artistry, had he not ransacked them with his display of contempt for sportsmanship.

So what of Maradona the manager? Put the tactics board to one side - that is where 1986 World Cup-winning coach Carlos Bilardo is expected to come in, in his role as general manager.

The philosopher, the rogue, the flawed genius - Maradona’s reign provokes thoughts of both romance and car crash.

No other icon’s presence could offer greater inspiration to what is aesthetically the finest squad of players in world football.

Within that remarkable pool of young talent, of course, stand his proteges - mercurial magician Lionel Messi, and the man seen as Maradona’s torch bearer in a paternal sense, Sergio ‘Kun’ Aguero (Giannina, the youngest daughter of Maradona, is pregnant with the Atletico Madrid forward’s child).

He feels it is his destiny to sweep these superstars off their feet and create a team for the footbaling world to admire.

But it’s hard to imagine this venture will pass without experiencing both sides of the contradiction that is Diego Armando Maradona.

“Jesus saves - but Maradona follows up with the rebound,” his fans once enthused, in reference to their hero’s self-proclaimed spiritual powers.

And there is one scenario the footballing Gods surely won’t resist conjuring up - England’s inevitable quarter-final penalty shoot-out exit in South Africa 2010 to Argentina. Diego Maradona’s Argentina. Don’t we just know it.